


00:00

by AwkwardFortuna



Category: The Old Guard (Comics), The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: And I just, Blow Jobs, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Study, Crack, Deepthroating, Dubious Consent, I Don't Even Know, I also head canon that Merrick fires Keane multiple times a day, I just feel like they both try to push each others buttons during sex, Immoral Husbands, Keane both hating Merrick and wanting to blow his back out at the same time??, LMAO, M/M, One Shot, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Smut, also its 3am, but I'm tagging as, but never really mean it, crackship, everything is consensual between them, fine line between love and hate ya'll, i saw on tumblr, just in case, loved that, murderous ideation??, or hate and lust, plz forgive errors, take ur pick, that this ship name was called
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:54:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26509348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwkwardFortuna/pseuds/AwkwardFortuna
Summary: Christ, some days Keane wants nothing more than to take Merrick’s squirrely little face into the palm of his hands and squeeze him until his body goes limp and his beady little eyes begin to bug out from his skull.Other days, when Merrick's being less of a prick and not trying to prove himself to a father who couldn't give less of a shit about him, Keane thinks that maybe, just maybe, he could learn to tolerate the man. But Merrick tends to make that funny little notion of his a difficult one to hold onto.(Or, what happened backstage before Merrick's Big Pharma speech.)
Relationships: Steven Merrick/Keane
Comments: 10
Kudos: 22





	00:00

Nothing can ever be simple with Steven Merrick.

A quick blowjob, for instance -like the one that Merrick is giving Keane right now- can never be _just_ a blowjob _(think greater, Keane, think bigger!)_ it's a goddamned _test._ A fucking experiment that requires rules ( _Be a good man and don't move,)_ and discipline. Keane's life has always been full of rules and discipline, he's no stranger to that, it's just that before his employment with Merrick, that discipline never extended towards his bedroom activities, and now, well...He's trying his best but Merrick's got a mouth that feels like sin and Keane can't hold himself back any longer so he thrusts forward, hips flexing beneath the palm of Merrick's hands, and shoves his cock in a few inches deeper.

Merrick pulls back with a gasp.

“Hold still, Keane,” he admonishes, his lips red from the blowing, brows furrowed in irritation, eyes bright with lust and slightly teary.

He looks fucking _wrecked_ and Keane wants nothing more than to grab him by the face and shove his way back inside but the stopwatch in Steven's hand begins to _beep._

He lets out a string of curses and glares up at Keane from his place on the floor.

“Damnit, Keane! If you had just stayed still I could’ve beaten my record!” 

Keane's dick bobs in the air between them, painfully forgotten but still achingly hard and shiny from Merrick's mouth. 

“I ask you to do one thing Keane, _one simple thing!_ and that’s 'stand still,' and what do you? _Hmm?_ You move when I precisely said _not_ to!“

Merrick's voice has gone annoyingly shrill in the way that it typically does when he's about to start a long and agonizing lecture that Keane does not get paid enough to listen to.

“Now we're out of time, all because _you_ can't listen to order!"

How the man still manages to shout at Keane despite having a cock down his throat just moments ago is beyond him.

"I mean honestly, Keane, if you can't even listen to orders as simple as that..." 

Christ, some days Keane wants nothing more than to take Merrick’s squirrely little face into the palm of his hands and squeeze him until his body goes limp and his beady little eyes begin to bug out from his skull. Other days, when Merrick's being less of a prick and not trying to prove himself to a father who couldn't give less of a shit about him, Keane thinks that maybe, just maybe, he could learn to _tolerate_ the man. But Merrick tends to make that funny little notion of his a difficult one to hold onto. 

"Why did I even hire you? You just fuck off and do whatever-"

Keane can picture it now; his hands wrapped tightly around Merrick's throat, the look of shock on his face, the panic in his eyes as the air leaves him. His pathetic attempts at clawing at Keane's wrists as if his little kitten-cat scratches would be enough to make him let go. The thought makes his dick twitch.

"And you're still hard?! Christ, Keane, what is it with you today? Are you just gonna stand there and-"

There's a knock at the door, Merrick tenses, his mouth drops into a little 'o' just inches away from the head of Keane's dick.

Merrick turns to shout what Keane can only imagine is a _"What the bloody hell is it now?!"_ but he doesn't get the chance to before Keane is grabbing a fistful of his hair and shoving him back onto his dick.

Merrick splutters, Keane lets out a moan and comes down his throat.

"W-wardrobe is ready for you, Mr. Merrick," a voice calls from the other side of the door. 

Merrick slaps against Keane's thighs and lets out a little grunt of indignation.

It draws out a few more drops of cum from Keane's dick and down the back of his throat. He tightens his grip on Merrick's hair.

"He'll be out in five minutes," Keane shouts, keeping Merrick pressed flush up against him until the shadow of the person on the other side of the door finally steps away.

Keane reluctantly lets his grip loosen and Merrick rears back with a gasp that quickly turns into a series of wet coughs.

"Y-you f-f-ucking prick," Merrick coughs, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "Y-you utter _cock_. I- I ought to terminate you-"

Keane raises an eyebrow at the man and motions towards the forming outline of his dick showing through the expensive cut of his tailored slacks.

"I told the lady you'd be out in five."

Keane crouches down before him, he knees Merrick's legs apart and kneels between them. 

"You wanna fire me now? Or after I get you off?"

Merrick looks up at him, utterly wrecked, pupils blown wide, mouth wet and flushed. There's a drop of cum at the corner of his lips and Keane brushes it off with the back of his thumb.

"A-after, I suppose." Merrick clears his throat. "Or not at all, depending on how well you do."

"Another test?" Keane sighs, grabbing Merrick by the hips and grinding up against him. "You still got your stopwatch?"

"Y-yes," he stutters, looking wildly In his pockets for it.

"Set it back to 00:00."

If it takes Merrick longer than five minutes to make it to wardrobe, well, no one mentions it.

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah idk what this is but I saw a kink meme for Merrick/Keane and then I saw someone calling their ship name 'Immoral Husbands' and I thought yes, YES I can do this lol. Crack ships, I love them.


End file.
